Once upon a time, I was broke. I used to view money as my enemy. It didn’t love me. It didn’t want me. And I had to pursue it like my life depended on it. Well, actually, it did. We were mortal enemies on opposite sides. I had to subdue it. Making money was war for me. And my scarcity mentality didn’t help at all. The little I would get, I guarded it like a thief. It was a very unhealthy relationship.

And before long, this war had drained my energy completely. I was losing my grip. I was spiraling down. Until I decided it was time to improve my relationship with money. That was the only way I was going to build wealth. And you know what? I was right. Improving your relationship with money is the only way you can build wealth, because I’ve been there and done it. Money is not your enemy. But poverty? Now, that is the real enemy. So how can you improve your relationship with money?

Understand money is a means to an end

Growing up, I thought all I needed was money and everything else would fall into place. The shock on me when I realized that money is just pieces of paper and coins. It should never be the end goal. The end goal is what that money will help you achieve. Money is just a tool to achieve your dreams. Getting a million dollars is not the goal. Getting a house worth a million dollars should be the goal. When you shift away from basing your goals and dreams on money, everything begins to fall into place. You start finding more streams of income, not to have a lot of money in your bank account, but to be able to buy what you really value the most.

Create positive feelings towards money

As I said earlier, I used to worry about money. I feared losing it. I feared spending it. I hated not earning enough. I only had negative feelings toward money. And this meant that even when I had enough money, I believed it won’t last long enough. It becomes a vicious cycle. Yes, you want to have money, but when you have it, you can’t manage it because of your fears and worries. So it comes and goes, and nothing changes in your life. But when you shift your feelings and start viewing it as an awesome tool to achieve your goals, you become more in sync with your spending habits. You value it more and treasure it even when it’s not enough. And you become more accountable.

Being wealthy is a mindset

Wealth won’t come from saving alone. Wealth won’t come from cutting down your expenses. Wealth begins in the mind. It’s a mindset built over time. Having the right mindset is like having a perfect engine for a car. It takes you wherever you want. So with the right mindset, money will help you achieve all your goals. No millionaire ever says their wealth came from a single job or investment. They tried all sorts of things to get where they are. If you believe you will never be wealthy because you never received an inheritance, so it will be. But if you believe you have what it takes to build wealth, that’s exactly what will happen. So shift your mindset.

Be frugal

To be frugal does not mean leaving on the edge of poverty. Frugality is being conscious about your spending habits, on spending on what is most necessary. Being frugal helps you understand that money is a scarce resource. Today you have it, tomorrow you don’t. It helps you create a budget and stick to it. To have an awesome relationship with money, you must learn to value it and account for every cent.

Happiness is important

While being frugal, you should understand that spending on things that bring you happiness is not wasting, unless you want to be a depressed millionaire. You work so hard to have what you have. So why not spend some of it on things that make you happy. Small purchases that bring you great joy like buying a good book, or an occasional gourmet chocolate or coffee, or buying your child a special treat, or sharing with the less fortunate is money well spent. This will give you the motivation to keep earning more.

Bottom line

You cannot build wealth when your relationship with money is wanting. However, improving your relationship with money requires grit, energy, and willingness. You have to change your money mindset now. Only and only then will you become wealthy!

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